Well, reader, by some miraculous force, Microsoft’s Bing search engine has somehow evaded an Ask Jeeves-esque demise, somehow going steady in the 12-ish years since its emergence. The miraculous force in question? Bing users evidently searching for “Google” – well, least, according to Google. 

While attempting to talk their way out of that pesky $5 billion EU antitrust fine earlier this week, attorneys for Google’s parent company, Alphabet Inc. attempted to sway the EU’s General Court that people actively choose to use Google rather than being forced to do so, citing the statistic as proof that the company isn’t forcing people to hand over every last scrap of their data use their search function against their will. 

“We have submitted evidence showing that the most common search query on Bing is by far Google,” Alphabet Inc. attorney Alfonso Lamadrid said on Tuesday, per Bloomberg. “People use Google because they choose to, not because they are forced to,” Lamadrid continued. “Google’s market share in general search is consistent with consumer surveys showing that 95% of users prefer Google to rival search engines.”

Despite these bold claims, it seems the data available to us non-Silicon Valley plebs may not entirely match the company’s assertions, as The Verge noted. Although Google does rank among the most popular Bing searches, boasting a search volume of 8,060,698, according to SEO company, Ahrefs, the search engine’s moniker actually ranks third, surpassed by YouTube and Facebook, respectively holding 11,452,722 and 12,983,821 searches. 

Top Image: Shutterstock

For more internet nonsense, follow Carly on Instagram @HuntressThompson_ on TikTok as @HuntressThompson_, and on Twitter @TennesAnyone.

Think Today Was Crazy?

Wait ’til you hear about the moments in history you missed! Get a new story sent directly to your inbox every day! No ads, no videos, just your daily shot of Cracked. Sign up now!