For those of you who didn’t get a chance to check out the BMW i5 Luggage Test, or just didn’t reach the end (oh, I’m soooooo sorry for boring you), you missed the sad news that there was a casualty in the luggage test ranks.
It was with great sadness that I announced the passing of the Small Blue Roller Bag. I picked it up one day with the top handle and the plastic shell it’s attached to broke/ripped apart from its connection at the extending walking handle thingy. It had been my main suitcase for nearly a decade and although I’ve replaced multiple wheel units over the years after they gave it their all after oh-so-many airport miles, this time the damage was terminal. Pun not intended.
As you can see, I did a bang-up job patching the damage with duct tape so I could take the bag on the press event I was literally about to leave for (it also let me use the bag for this and a few other luggage tests). That, however, was incredibly janky. I would need a new primary suitcase, and although I could certainly keep the small blue roller bag around to maintain continuity for luggage tests, that would mean keeping a bag in my garage ONLY for luggage tests. I rarely use one of the medium black bags as it is.
Let me now underline that “maintain continuity for luggage tests” bit. Four years and 100+ luggage tests would suddenly no longer be applicable to future ones if I suddenly threw in a totally new variable. These things are unscientific enough as it is. I’m going for Mythbuster Lite here, and throwing in “good enough” just won’t cut it. No, I would seek an exactly sized replacement. It would not be easy.
A half-hour trip to the Camarillo Outlet Mall’s handful of luggage stores proved fruitless. I brought along the broken-down blue bag for comparison, but nothing I checked out in my price range (under $200) was lining up. Sure, there’s a chance some fancy-pants thing could’ve been the Goldilocks choice, but I didn’t bother to check cause I ain’t dropping $600 on a suitcase (“Neither am I,” added Autoblog Editor-in-Chief Greg Migliore. Probably, I’m just assuming). I now dreaded driving and driving and driving throughout the greater L.A. area on a Quixotic endeavor for the right suitcase. Before doing that, though, I shrugged and turned to Amazon. After staring at measurements, it seemed like I found something that would work. It showed up. Nope, too wide. Shipped it back. I found another one, surely this would work based on this and that and also this. Nope, too deep. Back it went.
And then one day I was at Target. They had a bunch of bags, including some with the features I wanted for my personal use (locks, hard case, not ugly). On a subsequent trip, I became a weirdo shlepping a duct-taped old suitcase in a shopping cart through the store. I made sure to dress a bit spiffier than normal. There were two options that were in the ballpark, but the pale green bag shown above as the closest I had found yet. It is exactly the same height and exactly the same depth, and within a centimeter of width. In terms of inches, it’s exactly the same dimensions. As this is an American outfit, I was willing to call it.
Welcome to Team Luggage Test, Green Bag!
As a happy benefit, it’s a photogenic color, and it’s also a pretty nice bag, rolling far smoother and easier than the old blue bag. It’s also heavier, but you can’t win’em all. Price tag was $172. More than my cheap ass wanted to spend, but given the circumstances, whatever.
Now if you excuse me, I must now edit the boilerplate luggage dimension description.