'Shang-Chi' Is Further Proof The MCU Is A Saga About Terrible Dads

Now let’s look at Hulk. Even if the Ang Lee flick, where Bruce becomes the Unjolly Green Giant because of his father’s experiments/domestic abuse, isn’t officially in the MCU, The Incredible Hulk with Ed Norton is. And that movie would have been over in five minutes flat if General Ross didn’t have a personal vendetta against Bruce for smashing his daughter Betty. American dads are generally a tad too obsessed with their daughters’ sexuality (here’s a challenge for all my fellow foreigners: read up on American “purity balls” and try to keep your WTFs below 20.) But in The Incredible Hulk, it’s clear that the reason Ross has such a raging hate-boner for Hulk is that Bruce’s boner was once inside his daughter.

And then there is Odin, who’s somehow an even worse father than Thanos. The two are actually very similar. Like the quadruple butt-chinned wonder, Odin too abdopted one kid and seriously messed up another: Hela. He trained his daughter to be a warrior-conqueror her entire life, then one day decided to act surprised when she wanted to continue to be a warrior-conqueror. Before she could yell, “I learned it by watching you!” Odin was imprisoning her in another dimension and gaslighting all of Asgard about their history.

And it just keeps going like that: Star-Lord’s dad (shut up, Yondu, I’m trying to make a point), Ego from Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2, or Liz’s dad Vulture from Spider-Man: Homecoming are all the primary plot-driving forces of their movies, and their fatherhoods are their primary characteristics. Even T’Chaka, Black Panther’s dad, technically makes the list, since he abandoned his nephew N’Jadaka instead of taking him in and keeping him from becoming Killmonger.

In conclusion, Father’s Day cards and ties are probably as popular in the Marvel-verse as a Thanos-themed cereal called “Snap-Os!” (part of a perfectly balanced breakfast.)

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Top Image: Marvel Studios